What are you saying to yourself? Whatever it is, you probably believe it–because that’s how it works. But it’s a good news/bad news thing. If you are engaging in daily negative self talk, those ideas help shape your self image. AND if you are engaging in daily positive self talk, those ideas help shape your self image. We have done more damage to our self esteem than our enemies, our abusers, our haters, and our culture. We have self destructed—based on the self-insults we have had in our own heads. Self talk is the discourse between your ears based on your world view and self view. It can manifest emotionally, mentally, spiritually, even physiologically. The words you use about yourself fuel your self-regard. Where is your fuel taking you? Think about this: You have access to YOURSELF 24 hours a day, and your self talk can convince you to bypass opportunity, avoid risk, skirt around intimacy…BUT can also take you to the highest levels of yourself and help you attain your assigned purpose. If you do not learn to recognize that voice and shift it in daily purposeful ways, it will rob you of all you value and all you deserve.
Every day for at least a year, this woman (that would be me) said to herself, “you’re so stupid—you did it again,” “no one will love you if you don’t control your emotions,” and “you let everyone down because you are a fraud and you’re worthless.” Those words did tremendous damage to my heart and to my soul. Today I do mirror talk EVERY DAY (per my therapist): my five affirmations——
1. You are so fucking beautiful!
2. Your love is abundant and returned to you ten fold.
3. You make glorious mistakes and gain wisdom every day.
4. Every wound prepared you for this purpose you are stepping into.
5. You are kind and empathetic, and you are changing lives, starting with your own.
I encourage you to make your list of 5. Change it up. Be outlandish if you want. I know–it’s hard. But guess what? You don’t even have to believe it right away. Just stand at the mirror every single day and pronounce your worthiness TO YOURSELF. Over time, you will believe it. Be ridiculous. Be celebratory! Be magical! You will be transformed, I pinky promise.
In truth and love,